Happy February, and all that. Rabbit rabbit (reference?)

I'm looking through a bunch of summer undergrad research programs. I was quite excited at first, but so many (too many) have a stipulation that you can't participate if you've graduated/are going to graduate/otherwise have a degree. So, once again, I'm stuck in the middle: technically graduated, technically not graduated. Dammit, when is my damn degree going to be worth something?

4.0 summa cum laude in English!
SOMEONE LOVE ME.